My first instinct is to say that I hate old women. I probably do. I'm not a hateful person though, and I would like to say that I don't hate anything, but damn it, sometimes I hate old women. They come every day and I know it will nothing but trouble, because there will be something wrong with what we give them. Or they'll get a penny less than they expected. The worst situation is when they walk up to the desk and simply have no idea what they're doing.
"What would you like miss?"
"I don't know."
I wish I could treat that like the emergency it really is. Call one of the administrators to our shop. "This is serious, she just wandered over here and she has no idea what she is doing. Confused and aggressive. That's right. Send help."
Lately I believe I have a sixth sense for cloudy minds. People I used to think were sane are blipping my radar now; mostly women. I feel a little bad because I group everything together as Insanity. If I were to keep a tally of the customers I serve daily, I have to say that 30% of them are not insane. I'm worried 30% is a generous number. I'm afraid to count because I think they might be tallied on both hands. The conversation is going blah blah blah, and I'm thinking, "This lady is out of her mind." Blah blah blah. Completely insane.
Today a woman asks me for the mocha turtle. I can make that iced or hot, but the drink of the day is the steamed mocha turtle. Still I hate to assume, so I pointed at our specials menu and asked, "A steamed mocha turtle?" She said yes and followed me down the counter to watch me make the drink. I measure the flavour shots and pour it into the espresso. When I'm finished steaming the milk she says, "This is not the iced drink, is it?" Is it? as in, she knows it isn't, but she let me make it anyway. Ridiculous. And later comes the an impossible order. Some miserable woman wanted a cappuccino without milk. I asked her if she actually just wanted espresso, or coffee, but she was dead set on this milk free cappuccino. I eventually got her to agree to lactose free, but it was the worst struggle over something so ridiculous. Writing it down like this makes me think I was over reacting. But she was pretty much Queen of the Confused that day.
I wish I could tell customers off sometimes. Say something like, "HOW DARE YOU WASTE SO MUCH OF MY TIME?" "YOU HAVE OUTLIVED YOUR USEFULNESS AND ARE NOW A BURDEN." That's what I think about at the low points of my day.
Otherwise things are fab, honestly.
3 comments:
Hey when someone pisses me off like that I have something written on a sticky note to make me feel better
'she can't help she is batshit crazy'
It really helps me cope with all of the insane dufuses!
LOL you didn't tell me about the capp w/o milk crazy, man they are obviously drawn to you.
good read.
but, i'm really liking the "YOU HAVE OUTLIVED YOUR USEFULNESS AND ARE NOW A BURDEN". I think we should work that into our new senior discount day cards.
Discount Thursdays! ~Because You Are Now a Burden~
Post a Comment